is it rational to worry if the liquor store thinks you're an alcoholic?

alcoholic influence, originally uploaded by boskizzi.

i just received my shipment of booze from marketview liquors, a magical, magical website which offers nearly every booze possible at rates that are about $1-2 less (hard liquor) up to $10 less (wine) than retail, and delivers them directly to your door without you having to leave ever. now, i know that there are plenty of liquor stores in manhattan who also offer this service for a smaller delivery fee, but they're racist and refuse to come to bed-stuy so i do what i have to do.

as i'm opening the box though, i declared, "i bet marketview liquors thinks we're alcoholics." this is because we not only have ordered four times in the 2 months we've been back in nyc, but because at least one of those orders was two large boxes. the one box i just received contained two bottles of sancerre, port, a liter of vodka, a 1.75 of beam (this is the third beam replacement--a worrying realization when i consider that ross also bought us a bottle of maker's as a housewarming gift), and a liter of tequila.

in reality, this was a mostly unnecessary-at-this-time purchase; i am just making sure we don't run out and also it just looks really funny sat up on the bar in the kitchen. we weren't actually OUT of bourbon or tequila and in fact have half bottles of each left, the reason we were out of sancerre was because i gave one away for christmas, and i use vodka more for cooking than for drinking. but still this doesn't change the fact that A) marketview liquors would be right if they consider us alcoholics and B) why do i care what a liquor store thinks? i mean, why would you work in a liquor store except to get the discount on liquor anyway? and, if i worked in a liquor store, why would i make the assumption that a person was buying booze purely for their own and only their own consumption?

so many questions, that i forgot that i was considering having a glass of wine.

through all this, it only just now occurred to me to wonder if the ups man thinks i'm an alcholic.