alternate dimensions usually have it up on us in general, i find

there are some people who buy into a dumb, dumb theory that there are numerous alternate universes which are similar to ours, but with slight-yet-meaningful changes that alter the entire landscape. these people are called "superman fans" but bear with me. last night, the alternate universe where mike huckabee and hillary clinton were the nominees had a much more entertaining night! huckabee rambling about frying up possum in a coffeepot, clinton doing that insane finger-pointing tic that she picked up from her crazy husband (and probably saying "horseshit" under her breath, just like john mccain). so much more fun! though maybe neither of them would've said "go swallow your orgy of spending" or whatever.

also the debate would've looked like this, plus hillary:

because it would've been moderated by the most important person in the world, miss tyra banks.

oh well, whatever, debates are usually boring and not all of them can be zingy winners. looking forward to thursday's debate, in which joe biden will bluster endlessly about fdr solving the civil war by going on the XM satellite radio, and sarah palin will counter by threatening to bomb the new york senate, back in 1913, to prevent fdr from coming into power and invading her moose space.